rules: update

established rules:

#4: an angel's face is tricky when it comes to me.

#43: us is more important than the alternative.

#17: do not make out at the bar (rule pending reconsideration re: current developments)

#232: we do not pay to get into a bar.

#313: 2012 is the year the comet hits. or when tom cruise comes out of the closet. either way, the mayan calander was right.

#536: recovery is allowed, although the true damage is always there.

us vs. they,we,i,he,them

i got in a conversation tonight with friends about the good ole days. you all know what i mean. the times between the break ups and the self hatred, those times outside of the familial conflicts and the unanswered phone calls. its one of those things that happens with friends when friends decide to talk about us. not we or i or he or they, but us.

i want to scream out to all of my friends: i miss talking about us.

each of us, as individuals, spend too much time focusing on the other people that affect our lives, those that aren't there to tell their stories or to live it again with us, those that have run away and left us wanting, or those that we envy and watch from the corners of every eye. conversely we talk about how we superimpose ourselves into those situations, how the fabled 'i' would react, or what 'i' would have done. the singular, the third person, causes so much pain and confusion. we, they, i are all wishes, things outside of ourselves, outside of us, that embody negativity, dark dreams of an even darker need for acceptance and basically comfort.

'i' is alone. (only time in grammatical history that that is a valid sentence.) you project your observations on those around you, and more often than not your personal experience is not as influential in repetition as it seemed in memory.

'he' is too objective. tainted by perception he becomes a rose tinted view of some one else's time and some one else's action.

'we' hardly ever includes the target of the conversation. we is a egoistic and assumptive notion, as if you can speak for the ones that are left behind, the ones not there. its also a third person 'i', and usually more lonely.

'they/them' is the basis of gossip. they implies hatred, envy, contempt.

i was happy tonight talking about us. events shared by the people around you, emotions felt at the same time and place, a moment relived by those that lived it, smiling or sad, a union of remembrance.

rule #43: us is more important than the alternative.

the moral: let him go. us are all that matters.